I’m sitting at the airport now. There are two girls next to me who are clearly travelling together. As I sat there, these two girls got into a huge argument over how much money they should be spending at the airport.
Holiday fights are not unusual. When I was in the hotel, I overheard a family bickering because the mother kept barking orders at her children, and the children didn’t appreciate it.
Like like bacteria thrives in moist environments so too arguments and disagreements thrive during holidays or vacations. There is something about travelling with others. It forces you to work together.
This is not to say that all holidays will descend into argument and chaos. If you’re travelling with a great travel buddy, it’s a brilliant experience. I’ve travelled with good travel buddies before. However, if you’re travelling with a bad travel buddy, that is a big problem.
If you are travelling with someone and suddenly an argument breaks out, you are stuck with this person for the remainder of the holiday. You may even be sleeping with this person.
The better approach, in my opinion, is to travel solo and sleep alone. If you want to be with others, you can still agree to meet them at, say, a restaurant or cafe, and you can still agree to go on tours together. The benefit of travelling solo is that at the end of the day you retreat to your own space where you have privacy and freedom. From your own space, you can choose to be with others or to be by yourself. There are times you want to be with others and there are times you want to be by yourself. Travelling solo gives you the freedom to choose from both these options. However, when travelling with others, because accommodation and tours tend to be booked in advance, you are stuck with the people you’re travelling with.
If you have your own accommodation and you meet up with a friend, if you get into an argument with this friend, you have the option to simply never see him or her again.
There is nothing wrong with human intimacy and closeness. We humans are social creatures who need closeness with others. However, there are smart ways to get human intimacy without exposing yourself to the risk of being captive to human anger or hate.
Total independence is essential. You need to build a fortress for yourself where you are safe. You may venture out from this fortress to seek out human intimacy, but you do so cautiously, and you retreat back to your fortress when you are not comfortable. Every man need his own space.